Ashley Madison hacked: How to tell if your partner is cheating on you

MILLIONS of cheating husbands and wives are facing an anxious wait as hackers threaten to expose their dirty secrets online.

As many as 1.2 million Brits are member of the Ashley Madison website which is a dating network which “guarantees” people seeking to cheat on their husbands or wives they will “find someone”.

Unfortunately, infidelity is a reality for some of us and a devastation that all too many couples go through.

If you think your partner is having an affair, then there are signs to watch out for.

Have they lost interest in having sex with you? This can either be a gradual change or all of a sudden.

You may want to question what is going on if this has happened, especially if your sex life has always been good.

If things have slowed down in the bedroom, then it could be that your partner is showing someone else some special attention.

If men suddenly change their appearance, then this can also be a red flag that they are cheating.

Has he lost weight, bought new clothes and joined a gym without your knowledge?

Is he wearing a new aftershave and acting more confident?

Does your partner guard their mobile with their lives and constantly check their messages, especially on Facebook? If they don’t share who has texted or emailed them and everything is now password-protected, then this could also be a sign that something is not right.

Does he switch off his mobile when he is with you so he doesn’t get any texts or phone calls from his mistress?

If, all of a sudden, your partner is happy when they leave the house instead of being miserable to go to their job like they used to be, then this may also be a sign of infidelity.

Getting up early and coming home late maybe aren’t sure signs that they are cheating but they can be early warning signs that something is not quite right.

Have they stopped making eye contact with you when you have a conversation? This is usually a sure sign of guilt eating at them.

How about mystery charges on your credit card bill for gifts that you did not get or trips you didn’t take or nights in a hotel you knew nothing about.

If your partner is spending far too much time away from you and it seems like they can’t stand to be in the same room with you when they are home, then this too may be behaviour that sets alarm bells ringing.

Has your partner started spending more time with a colleague at work or do they talk about them constantly? When you meet someone new, it’s exciting and you want to tell the world about them.

It can be hard to be sure if someone is cheating on you but go with your gut instinct. If you feel something isn’t right about your relationship, then it probably isn’t.

In many cases, the warning signs can be there early on in the relationship and once you spot them, you can save yourself a lot of pain by ending things right there and then or talking them through with each other.

The good news is that not everyone cheats.

Infidelity and relationships don’t always go hand in hand. The important thing to remember is that cheating is a choice, it’s not some biological need.

The best deterrent to cheating is finding the right partner.

Is romance dead? Some dads seem to think so

BRITISH dads would rather spend every moment of their spare time with their children than have an evening in with their partners.

Swapping romantic alone time for a kick around in the park with their kids, a study has found a quarter of British men would rather be with their children, favouring it to time with their wives or girlfriends. 

A study showed 26 per cent of men aimed to spend up to 10 hours a day with their children, with just five per cent of men opting for one-on-one time with their ladies. 

Research conducted by leading bed makers Silentnight discovered more than a quarter of dads surveyed valued family time so much they saw sitting down together at meal times as daily goal - aiming to dine with their kids at least once a day.

Interestingly in comparison to their parents generation, more than 25 per cent of men surveyed claimed to spend less time with their wives and girlfriends than their mums and dads.

Juggling the family balance 30 per cent of dads also believed they slept less and spent less time with their friends than their parents.

A quarter of dads claimed they spent more time with their children than their dads, with busy dads today sacrificing (27 per cent) sleep and hobbies to spend time with their kids.

Keen to be involved in day-to-day family rigmarole, Dads said a ‘good ingredient’ to a top day with the kids was planning leisure activities (32 per cent).

However despite being more hands on than ever, the poll of 1,461 UK parents lifted the lid on why dads are avoiding their better halves - in a bid to duck out of the housework.

While they may like being with the kids, shockingly only 14 per cent of men said getting the housework done was an achievement - while more than double the amount of women (37 per cent) made it one of their daily milestones. 

Instead dads were reluctant to avoid other family tasks, with 28 per cent enjoying taking their children to hobbies and only two per cent opting to duck out of the school run if they were having a busy day.

A spokesman for Silentnight, Nick Booth, said: “What is really interesting from the research is almost a third of dads said having a good nights sleep in preparation for the next day, improved time spent with their children.

“As a parent we are constantly juggling routines, social lives and work pressures, so sleep is very important to maximise time with our families.

“British dads are more hands on than ever, so it is more important we look after ourselves and make time for ourselves - which can be something as simple as a good nights sleep.”

10 gifts to buy your boyfriend

Guys can be so difficult to buy presents for. 

However, don’t worry if your man doesn’t have an Amazon wishlist as there are lots of cute gifts you can buy him and the best part is- many of them won’t break the bank.

So if you want to buy the love of your life a present for Valentine’s Day, his birthday or Christmas, then check out these ideas:

Sweets with your name on them: 

Online there are lots of websites where you can personalise your confectionery. I really like the love heart sweets where you can pop your name on the wrapper and inside each candy has cute message already on them.  Marshmallow company boomf.com is also awesome as they will pop your photos on their sweets. 

Make him ‘Love’ vouchers:

Buy some multi-coloured index cards and on each one write a “service” you’ll provide him. Some can be romantic like a hug, kiss or massage or you can be a little bit naughty. Others can give a service like picking up his dry cleaning or walking his dog. 

Teddy Bear with a Message:

You can get an ordinary teddy bear and tie a message to its neck or you can order a personalised teddy bear from the Build a Bear shop. Teddy bears are one of the most cute boyfriend gift ideas. 

Create a Scrap Book: 

You probably have lots of pictures of the two of you. If you have paper mementos from dates – ticket stubs, concert programmes, etc., you can include them as well. He’ll appreciate that you went to all of the work to memorialise your relationship. 

Matching Jerseys: 

If he has a favourite player on a favourite sports team, get both of you jerseys to match. Include a note that you can wear them the next time you watch a game. He’ll appreciate the sentiment of the jerseys and he’ll also appreciate that you are eager to spend time with him while he’s watching the game. 

Message in a Bottle:

Write him a love letter and place it in a bottle. You can make it a romantic note filled with your hopes for the pair of you in the future or you can make it sexy. It’s a romantic and unique thing to do. 

Inscribed Watch

Over the years I’ve found men love watches- many actually like to build up a collection. If you save up to buy your man this type of gift then make sure you get a lovely message from yourself inscribed onto the back of his watch. An engraved watch is a classic gift and one he will cherish forever.

Mouse Pad:

Take a photo of yourself in a somewhat racy pose and then have it made into a mouse pad. That way, when he’s playing World of Warcraft or Grand Theft Auto, he’s thinking of you.

Recordable key chain:

Go to Amazon or an electronics store and get a recordable keyring. Then leave a romantic or sexy message on it. In my case my fiancé says he loves my little catchphrases, so I bought him one with them all on it. He says he has 'Lindsey in his pocket'  And let’s face it, your man has got to keep his keys close – and that means he’ll keep you close too. 

Cook him his favourite meal

They say the way to a man’s heart is through his stomach and I totally agree. Guys love a woman who cooks for them and makes a fuss over them. So dim down the lights, cook him his favourite foods and get your sexy lingerie looked out as you will no doubt become dessert.

10 tips to NOT arguing with your partner at Christmas

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Cheating: Seven-year itch theory dispelled by new research

• 72% of cheating men find their partner less attractive than before they committed to the relationship

• The biggest lull in sexual attraction occurs between the 3rd and 6th years of a relationship

• Lack of attraction is likely to end more than 60% of relationships

A recent survey conducted by Victoria Milan – a leading website for attached people looking to cheat – reveals when the spark in relationships is most likely to burn out – and it happens well before the notorious seven-year mark.

More than 3,600 male cheaters who are active members of Victoria Milan answered questions that delved into the ups and downs of their long-term relationships.

45% of cheating men say the honeymoon period didn’t start to wane until the third year of marriage – it was at that point that they stopped enjoying sex with their significant other. 

One quarter of unfaithful men claim it is between the third and sixth year of a long-term relationship that they are the least sexually attracted to their partner.

The sixth year is when the fire lights up again – dispelling the infamous theory that the seven-year mark is when infidelity is most likely to occur.  30% of men claim that after the sixth year of marriage, things really start to heat up.

CEO and Founder of Victoria Milan, Sigurd Vedal, said the results indicate that while it’s fun to have a daring and dirty dalliance from time to time, long-term relationships are often forever.

“Often, it’s having affairs that rekindle the spark in a cheating couple’s relationship. Perhaps they appreciate each other more after trying what’s out there – maybe they are turned on by their partner’s ignorance to the secrecy and sexiness of the forbidden fruit they taste, and the risks associated.  Either way – at Victoria Milan, we know they aren’t waiting seven years to find out what it tastes like,” he said.

For ladies out there concerned that their man might be preparing to stray, Victoria Milan has the answers from cheaters who no longer find their partner attractive. 

Nearly half of cheating men (47%) say they would like their lady to be more feminine and wear high heels, while 32% said weight-loss and diet would go a long way in heating up the relationship.  Save that trip to the salon and shopping mall – a haircut will only get 12% of men interested again, and a fashion make-over will nab you 9%

My Daily Record Column: 10 tips to surviving a holiday with your partner

Check out this week's column on the Daily Record website where I reveal the best ways to have an awesome holiday with your partner.

CLICK here to read it!

Heart conditions affecting over a million people's sex lives

More than one million people in the UK could have stopped having sex lives altogether as a result of a heart condition, a leading charity has said.

Heart patients and their GPs should talk openly about sex issues, the British Heart Foundation said, after its survey found nearly a fifth of people with heart conditions, or 19%, found sex impossible and nearly a third, or 32%, have had sex less often as a result of their condition.

One in five respondents said they were worried about having a heart attack or cardiac arrest during sex.

The survey of 1,511 patients for the BHF magazine Heart Matters found 14% had lost interest in sex because of the emotional impact of their condition. Nearly half the men surveyed, 46%, said medication for their condition had caused erectile dysfunction.

The charity said more than seven million people in the UK suffer from heart and circulatory conditions including stroke and the heart rhythm disorder atrial fibrillation.

Based on the survey results, it estimated that more than one million people could have stopped having sex because of their heart condition.

In spite of the widespread problem, the charity said 30% had not discussed the issue with anyone including their doctor and 8% said they would have liked to get professional help but could not.

Doireann Maddock, senior cardiac nurse at the BHF, said: "Sex is a hugely important part of life, but isn't getting the attention it deserves in the consultation room.

"We're hearing loud and clear from Heart Matters readers that they need better support and information on how to deal with issues affecting their sex lives.

"Problems like erectile dysfunction can often be tackled and rectified, but the first hurdle is identifying people who need that help.

"We'd like patients to feel comfortable and empowered to raise these issues, and for the NHS to proactively offer support in this area to everyone who needs it."