Saturday, 20 July 2013

When is the Right Time to Say 'I Love You'?

If you are in a relationship and your partner rocks your world then the first time they tell you that they 'love you' is one of the most special moments of your life. It's the moment you will treasure as it's the point in the relationship where you get the validation that you have been so eagerly waiting for: They feel the same way as you do about them.

So when is the right time to say 'I love you' and who should utter the amazing words first?

Well every relationship is different. Some couples wait a long time before making that kind of emotional commitment while others are prepared to let their true feelings known within the first few months of a new relationship if it feels right. 

You have to make sure of your true feelings and if it is actually love you are feeling because once you tell your partner you love them then there is no turning back.

Sometimes while dating we may have mixed emotions. Feelings may be just infatuation or admiration or lust. These are synonymous to love. At times the best thing is to say nothing at all as you really have to be sure how you feel about the other person.

There is a certain kind of risk involved in saying I love you. Timing is everything when confessing your love to someone. You have to gauge if their feelings are as strong for you while trying to read their body language as you weigh up if your relationship is strong and happy enough to merit the 'L' word. If you tell someone you love them at the right time then you can take the relationship to the next level which is an awesome feeling as you know your partnership has a future you want to build on.

When you tell someone you love them you have to be aware that this in itself is a huge commitment you are making to the relationship as it's basically you telling your partner that you are willing to share yourself with them, cherish them, and let them into your life fully-warts and all.

So who in the relationship should say 'I love you' first?

Well I'm a bit of a traditionalist to be honest when it comes to romance and relationships. That's why I firmly believe it should be the man in the relationship who says 'I love you' first. 

I'm sorry girls but I don't know many relationships that have lasted long when the girl blurts it out first. As we know men are so different emotionally when it comes to love and romance and it usually takes them a little longer to work out how they really feel about someone. 

If a woman tells her man she loves him first it can startle him and send him into a panic that you want marriage and kids so soon into the relationship which may lead him to walk away from you. Also, if a woman says it first then then guy might say it back to her without really meaning that he loves her. 

If a man tells you that he loves you first then you really know it's the truth instead of a knee-jerk reaction. I fell in love with my partner incredibly quickly but I kept my mouth shut until he decided the time was right to tell me exactly how he felt about me. Now i didn't have long to wait before we both knew we were on the same page but if it doesn't happen as quickly for you then don't get down about it, just bide your time. Girls don't kill your relationship before it's even begun by being too clingy and confessing your love too quickly. Let your relationship breathe and let it take its natural course. If he loves you then he will tell you, but only when he is ready. 

To say I love you is exciting but when you say so be ready to face any answer.
Remember that all love stories don’t have a happy ending. When you come to the moment it may be daunting but don’t shy away from doing it as long as you are being sincere and honest with your partner.

After you say 'I love you' and you get the response from your partner that you were dreaming off then in my opinion that's when the fun begins. There is no more game playing and second guessing how your partner feels about you. It's so refreshing when the pair of you feel the same about each other as it brings you closer together and you both begin to open up more and get to know each other even better.

However, once you profess your love to someone please don't think the hard part is over because this is when the relationship really gets going and gains momentum.

It's important you continue to make sure your partner knows how you feel about them and they are aware of how special a person they are to you. Tell them you love them as much as you can depending on your personality. I was very lucky to have been raised within a family that told each other every night before bed that we loved each other. This is a behaviour I carried into my long term relationship- my partner knows every day how much I love him.

So boys if you love your partner then let her know!